Tuesday 11 January 2011

Marathon musings and difficult decisions

I was wrong about the deadline for withdrawing from Stockholm Marathon. I thought it was last Saturday, but it is tomorrow. Tomorrow is also the day I'm seeing my physiotherapist. A fortunate coincidence?

I've written about having mixed feelings about this before: disappointment because I wouldn't get to run this, relief because the pressure would be off. My foot has also been giving me mixed signals, from hardly making a fuss to making it impossible to even walk. Rest doesn't seem to be a factor in this; I haven't been out running (or walking, for that matter) for almost a week now, but my foot hurts more than ever.

Dropping out
is now rapidly becoming an unavoidable reality. The clock is ticking, counting down the days to the marathon. I'm back at square one, struggling through 5 km. I mean, realistically, how can I ever manage 42 km with only 4 months of training left (and that is, if my foot magically gets better)? If I had years of training behind me, it might be possible to overcome a short break. But I don't.

Besides
, even if I managed to run the distance, what price would I pay? How much higher would the risk for further injury be?

My disappointment right now is not because I'll have to drop out. It's because I can't bloody run.

It's time to lick my wounds
and admit defeat, to see this as a valuable lesson learned. Yes, I still LOVE running far, but I can't go from half-marathon to ultra over night. I need to be wise about this from now on. Take inspiration from others, but also know my own limitations. Take the time my body needs to adapt to longer distances. Listen to any signals it might be sending. Focus on technique, improve it. Run less on tarmac (even if I love how I get into a nice flow there). Do other sports.

I'm waiting to see what my physiotherapist thinks about this injury before I send the withdrawal email, in case she's able to wave a magic wand and fix my foot, but everything points to 2011 not being my year to run a marathon.

And what direction will this blog take then? What purpose will it serve?

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