Humble pie

From sorry ass to bad ass to dumb ass – all within one day!

Sorry ass: I was certain that the past two days' bad form would keep even today. I didn't know if I would go out for a run or if I should rest.

Bad ass: Seeing as I might not go for a run, I decided to do some spring cleaning. Yes, I know it's summer. Let's just say that this particular matter was low on my list of priorities.

It took three hours and by that time I had found the flow I couldn't find in running this week. I could have gone on forever. However, the clock was ticking and I had to make up my mind. Would I run to town and meet J for some climbing? Or would I call him and say I wanted to keep cleaning instead?

9 km later I was sitting red faced but happy in J's office. I had had a great time making it up the hills in Änggårdsbergen and I was ready to do some easy climbing. Or so I thought. Once we were at the gym, I started with a 6B that has been hit and miss. Sometimes I find it easy, others impossible. Today I found it easy. When I was about half way up, I realised there was a small crowd of 7-year olds gathered at the foot of the wall, looking at me. ”Look, she's almost at the top!” they exclaimed. I beamed, my chest inflated with pride, and climbed onwards, a stupid smile on my face.

To think that a bunch of 7-year olds' amazed faces could give me wings. I got cocky. I wanted to try the 5+ on the overhang, a route that I've tested before, but only got about 2/3 of the way. It's easy up to that point, but then it gets really hard: the wall gets almost horizontal.

Dumb ass: I waited impatiently for J to finish his climb. I was bursting with energy and confidence. I was going to make it up the 5+ this time, I just knew it. The thought of how I impressed those kids would carry me all the way to the top. But by the time it was my turn to climb, my confidence had waned. I didn't want to look up at the horizontal part of the wall. I wanted to feel strong again. I started climbing, fast, determined. But it is a high wall. I got to the first carbine that I had to pry loose and my arms died. I tried holding on to the wall, desperately hoping that my strength would magically return, but in the end I had to face the facts. It was the end of this climb for me. I let go off the wall and hung there in the air, several metres from the ground, thankfully with no little kids around to disappoint. I was humbled, once again, by the great wall.