And, before we even knew it, Christmas was over for this year. The last few days felt strange. It was like I have been inflating like a balloon for the past few weeks, with interviews and job applications and studies and training and baking and the whole trying to get into the Christmas spirit, and then I reached the point where I couldn't stretch myself any more and burst. Any energy I might have had disappeared into the ether and all that remains is a very tired Shaman. A Shaman that sleeps close to 10 hours per night. And then still feels tired the rest of the day.
I got a brief glimpse of inspiration and an injection of energy yesterday. Looking ahead at what 2013 might bring in terms of races, I thought about Lapland Ultra. It wasn't the first time, of course. It is a race I've considered before, but never been able to train for because of injuries. I have a running buddy in Gothenburg who is interested in running it with me, and we've been talking about it for ages. But yesterday, looking through the excellent ultra running book ”Relentless forward progress”, I realised it was only six months left to the race. I quickly found a training plan in the book's pages and started forming my own plan, converting miles to kilometres and making modifications to allow for my existing training with AIK. I was buzzing with energy and anticipation.
|Looking ahead, Kungsleden, 2011|
Then this morning I looked at the training plan again. It sank in, the kind of a commitment it would take, and -more importantly- the risks for new injuries it would bring. And the air went out of me once again. Can I pull this off?
The run I went for later on felt uninspired. Just running around to collect my 10km for the day. Of course, this lack of inspiration has consequences for this blog too. If I don't feel inspired in my running, how can I write about it? I don't want to just document my training – I use jogg.se for that. I've also had some thoughts lately about what I wanted to do with this blog, and if I really wanted to continue writing here. I'm not so sure any more. It used to serve a purpose, but that is now redundant.
Maybe it's just a phase.