Invisible

I survived yet another arse sighting at the gym today, mainly because said arse was better covered than the one last time. So, despite everything, I was feeling pretty good when I went to the free weights room, an area maybe 2 by 5 meters wide, to do my barbell squats and lunges. The room was empty but I still kept to the side while preparing the weights. From there I could watch myself in the mirror and make sure that my technique was good so that I didn't get injured. 

So imagine my surprise when, before I even had a chance to get started, this young woman walks into the EMPTY APART FROM ME room, drags a weight-lifting bench almost right in front of me, partially blocking my view, sits there and starts doing bicep curls. Now, I'm not a violent or even confrontational person, at least when it comes to total strangers, so I kept my mouth shut. But I wondered if maybe I  was invisible. 

Just think about all the cool stuff I could be doing right now. Sneaking into concerts. Bumping into random people in the street. Haunting houses. That kind of thing.

My suspicion that I had, in fact, turned invisible was confirmed later on, during my run home. I was pounding the pavement, keeping the road to my right, when out of a parking lot to my left I see a couple with a pram coming. They look in my direction. Continue to push the pram. I'm thinking that they must have seen me and they'll stop pushing that pram any second now. But no. The woman looks at me with a far away look in her eyes and pushes the pram until it comes to a stop where it completely blocks the whole pavement and I have to jump into the street to avoid colliding with it. That's it. I'm see-through.

What was it that made me this way? Was it my 100-day no-sugar challenge? Are thousands of scientists wrong about sugar being completely unnecessary in our diets? Is sugar really the stuff DNA is built on? The stuff that makes us visible? Scale says it can't be because I'm losing any weight and withering away into nothing anyway, that's for sure.

That's what was going through my mind when my new boss called me to finalise the final details about the job. I'm starting on Tuesday on a part-time basis, going into full-time at the end of the month. I hope I've turned back to normal before then. It might be hard to do my job if no one can see me.